Emotions

Having trouble controlling your emotions?  Don’t worry it’s more common than you think.  Take some time to evaluate what you believe and think about situations.  This may help you gain a different perspective.  Check this out:

 

EVENT===> BELIEFS ===> THOUGHTS ===> FEELINGS ===> ACTIONS

Two Definitions:

Subjective Opinion

Something must be wrong because he did not answer his phone.

Objective Reality

He did not answer his phone. I do not know why.

 

How emotion is created:

  1. An external event happens
  2. We develop perceptions about the event based on our beliefs:
    1. How we see the world (Our Worldview)
      1. Where did we come from?
      2. What has gone wrong with the world?
      3. What is the solution?
  3. We have thoughts based on the beliefs about the event.
  4. We feel emotion based on the thoughts we have.
  5. We behave – some action or response on our part.

Example 1a:

  1. The external event:
    1. Someone cuts you off (pulls in front of you) while driving
  2. Your belief:
    1. People should be nice
  3. Your thoughts:
    1. “That person is a jerk!”
  4. Your emotion:
    1. Anger
  5. Your behavior:
    1. Yelling at the other driver

Example 1b:

  1. The external event:
    1. Someone cuts you off (pulls in front of you) while driving
  2. Your belief:
    1. People should be nice
  3. Your thoughts:
    1. “We could have crashed!”
  4. Your emotion:
    1. Fear
  5. Your behavior:
    1. Crying

Example 1c:

  1. The external event:
    1. Someone cuts you off (pulls in front of you) while driving
  2. Your belief:
    1. We live in a sinful world. People are sinful.
  3. Your thoughts:
    1. “I hope they had a reason for being in a hurry.”
  4. Your emotion:
    1. Calm
  5. Your behavior:
    1. Continue driving

Notice that there are hundreds of possible variations to this scenario.  All of these variations center around beliefs and thoughts.  The key is to examine your beliefs and thoughts about objective reality.  The New Living Translation 1 Corinthians 13:12 reads: “Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.” Remember that we do not see things well and we must examine our perceptions about reality.

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